Let’s be honest

To be honest, I actually do not know why I decided to take the time out of my busy schedule to help all of you tell people all the things you want to tell your friends(or enemies)…but cannot because you are afraid of the (usually painful) consequences. Well, thank God for me because Honest has no friends. I can say whatever I want, whenever I want as long as it is the truth.

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To be honest, I am a typical grandma. You can come to me for comfort but that does not save you from the occasional spanks you get when you do something bad. Your comfort will come when I help you take the load off your chest to tell that friend that that body hugging shirt of hers should really not be an instrument of suicide. I will also shame you when I speak about how  some of you “forget” to tell us that the gold chains and watches you post on twitter are only copy and pastes from google images. (so sad)

I will talk about anything that interests me. The difference between me and others would probably be that I will tell you exactly how I feel about it.

I promise never to use passive phrases like “mistakes were made” or “shots were fired”. I am here to let you know who made the mistakes and who fired the shots.

To be CLEAR (and of course honest), I am not a gossip column. I am not here to point fingers at anyone. Honestly, who has Perez Hilton’s time? All I am doing is talking abut some general and common occurrences that are built on the culture of lying. I plan to show you how society created it and what parts we take in encouraging its sustenance.

I am just a straightforward child of Honesty looking for a way to let you all know that lying is overrated. For instance, a blog,”Truth about deception”, states that some benefits of lying could be that ;

TO BE HONEST!….is to enter the Kingdom of Heaven

-_______-

Okay let me give you my serious and honest analysis on all those

1) The truth can be hurtful.

Raise your hand if you have ever been lied to? First of all, if you knew you had been lied to that means you found out the truth. Raise your hand if it hurt? *throws hand up recklessly*

I’m so enthusiastic because I feel you. Lies hurt. Unfortunately , they only hurt when we find out the truth. When we find that truth out, the first thing that usually comes to our mind is why didn’t he/she just tell the damn truth?! WHY??

EVEN MORE UNFORTUNATE….is how our own lies can put us in more troubles than we needed to be in. Okay, let us all assume our tales by moonlight positions.

tales-by-the-moonlight

Story Story…STOOOORY. So when I was little, the housegirls used to keep me on a serious eba diet.Eba is a Nigerian staple food made from cassava. I had eba every afternoon for not less than five years. at least they thought I did…

See what I would do is ask them to get me water, or look to see if someone was knocking in order to get them away from me for a few moments. When they left, I would stick the eba under the dining table. I only figured this out in the last stage of my eba “cleanse”. MOST unfortunately, that was the year we decided to move. And because my parents are so stingy that they cannt spend money to buy a new table, they decided we would take our old furniture with us

As we turned the table, ready to leave and live with a hale and hearty piece of furniture, my mum and I were confronted with a party of creatures who had seemingly created a village off my eba deposits. I can only show you what happened next.

This was me…

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This was mummy…

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To be very honest…IT COULD HAVE BEEN SO MUCH WORSE!

I was already doing that rubbing hands on the floor trick to get my magic(odeshi) ready to bounce off the pain from the cane I was expecting anytime soon. However, she just looked at me and said “what happened?” She really did not know that I was being fed eba every afternoon and she was in fact angry with the maids and not me. Yet, I stayed disappointed in myself for lying to her for that long. If only I had told her the truth, we would have an “antique” table in our current home and perhaps I would have enjoyed the nourishment of a better diet. Just perhaps.

Back to my honest analysis

2)To avoid unnecessary conflict.

3) To maintain a sense of Privacy

Honestly, let us not waste anybody’s time, I think that story covers it all. Lies are all dominoes, telling one often sets off so many other avoidable and more dangerous dynamites than the original consequence of the original action. Telling the truth may be less hurtful but that sensation is only enjoyed for the moment. Why buy 10 dollar shoes you will have to change every month for 12 months when you can just by a 50 dollar pair that can last you for the same year. Yes, taking out the50 dollars is painful (TRUST ME..I GET YOU). But, you will still feel the pain of the total 120 dollars you will spend when you get your bank statement at the end of the year.

Also,I dont think you have to lie to keep your privacy, I think we can keep our businesses and affairs private without lying. This a topic for anther honest day

I hope you all learnt a few things about being honest today. So, till next week, live honestly and inspire others around you to.

P.S Not all parts of the story I told was true

 

but HEY! i’m honest enough to admit it 🙂

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Yours Sincerely,

Honest.

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